One Month Down


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Holy cow we’ve made it a whole month.

Time really does fly by with your 2nd kid – I’m not sure why. Maybe it’s because every waking moment is filled with “something to do” when you have two kids. When Owen is napping I try and make sure I’m bonding with Olive….or cleaning the house, or doing the laundry, or pumping, or cooking….there really isn’t a moment awake that I have for myself. (Other than this rare, rare moment I’ve found to write this post, which is a complete surprise today, yay.) There also really isn’t as much time to think about how mind numbingly exhausted you really are when you’re awake. There is just too much stuff to do.

The transition between 1 to 2 kids has been kinder to me than the transition between 0 to 1 kid. I think it’s because of a few things: Firstly, you aren’t so shellshocked at the your complete loss of independence. You’re already knee deep into the Mom Thing, so you know what you have to do, so you just bite down and do it. You aren’t lamenting about that party you’re missing, or that monthly spa day you’ve had to give up. You already went through that psychological stuff the first time around, so you’re set on that front. Secondly, when you’re in that tough newborn period where the baby nurses every 2 hours, your nipples are raw from use, the gassiness starts….you know that this is a short, temporary phase that will soon be replaced by smiles and giggles. All this lethargy and discomfort will pass, and it’s really such a short blip of time in the grand scheme of things.

If you’re a first time mom in the throes of Newborn-Anxiety-and-Disillusion….. and you’re sad, and frustrated, I promise you that it will get better, and very soon.

By the way, this doesn’t mean that I haven’t completely lost my shit yet; because I have. When Owen was about 2-3 weeks old, Olive caught this nasty cold from school. (OF COURSE SHE DID. #Life) She was pouring snot, and coughing everywhere, and had a fever. I was petrified of Owen getting sick as well, so I spent about 5 days intensely stressed out, disinfecting everything and breastfeeding Owen non stop to give him antibodies. Everything came to a head one night at about 10pm when Olive threw up in her bed because of all the coughing. She was screaming and crying, and Owen had gas at the same time and was also screaming his lungs off. In that moment, the combination of the two screaming kids, the illness, the stress and the lack of sleep just took over and I broke down crying. If Patrick wasn’t there to help me divide and conquer (he took care of Olive, and I took care of Owen), I’m not sure what I would have done. In that moment, I was truly lost. It sucked.

Hopefully, this juggle-two-sick-kids-while-dealing-with-vomit thing will be a rare occurrence – and the days (and my hands) will be filled with healthy kids instead.

By the way, it’s taken me a full THREE DAYS to write this one post. I’ve written it in bursts of rare spare time and energy, so if it seems scattered and disorganized, well – it’s because that’s the state of my brain these days, so you’re going to have to excuse me.

I hope to check in again soon, when I get a better sense of my bearings. I hope everyone is well!

GOODNIGHT!

With Love,

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